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Dave Season 1 Finale – Lil Dicky Relives “The Breakfast Club” Interview, and Charlemagne Is Just as Insulting

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To my knowledge, Dave is more or less based on Dave Burd’s journey to becoming Lil Dicky. So when the season one finale opened with a ten-minute long music video about Lil Dicky exposing his nutsack to a crowd of fans at a show, I totally bought it…until he was sentenced to jail time. I’m pretty sure if Lil Dicky went to jail for two years (let’s be honest, he would’ve been out in 8 months on good behavior) I would’ve heard about it. But I digress. The intro started losing me a little bit at the end if we’re being honest, so I think it would’ve done them good to have chopped off a couple of minutes and cut to the meeting, which is the true setting for this “masterpiece”, as Dave puts it. Let’s talk about that word…”masterpiece”. I think that even though Dave is a comedian, even he could see that a song about sucking a Mexican guy’s dick in prison wouldn’t be the easiest thing for a record company to market. For the first time all season, I was actually on the side of his manager, Mike. But, Dave wants total creative control, and he sure as hell doesn’t want a bunch of suits to tell him how to express his art, and I can respect that.

We then see Dave going over possible Lil Dicky logos with Emma, Ally’s roommate. As someone whose “job” it is to follow a show’s storyline (especially one as simple as Dave), I’ve gotta admit I’m pretty embarrassed to admit that I was totally shocked to realize that Dave and Ally had broken up. I guess Dave driving home alone in episode nine should’ve been a dead giveaway, but my dumb male brain assumed it was just a fight. Also, how long is it supposed to have been in between episodes nine and ten? Dave asks Emma if Ally is dating, and for a relationship of their length and seriousness, I’d have to assume that it’s been AT LEAST a few weeks or a month that they’ve been broken up. And if not, isn’t that super fast for someone to move on after a long-term relationship? I mean, what does it say about their relationship if she’s so willing to date the next shmuck who hits on her in the line at Starbucks? Dave should take that into careful consideration before they undoubtedly get back together.

Despite literally everyone in Dave’s inner circle thinking it’s a terrible idea, he decides, with the help of Benny Blanco (by far the best cameo role this season) that the best way for him to get what he wants is to perform his offensive masterpiece “Jail” on The Breakfast Club. Their thinking was that if people love the song, the record company will release the song and everything will be fine, but if people hate it, they’ll drop Lil Dicky from their label, giving him back his creative control – it’s a win-win! However, when he’s faced with the decision to play or not to play the song live on air, he takes a good hard (dramatic) look at Mike and GaTa, who had just backed him up on the show about being a serious rapper despite being an upper-middle-class raised Jewish guy from the suburbs. Ultimately, he decides to freestyle instead of playing “Jail”, and ends up spitting absolute FIRE, rapping about topics ranging from his weird dick to how he just broke up with his lady. It’s safe to say we’ll be greeted with a much more famous Lil Dicky in season two, and I can’t fucking wait.

Like I said earlier, a lot of Dave is based on Dave Burd’s real life, so I wondered if he was actually on The Breakfast Club at any point, so I YouTube’d it. It turns out he was, and I’ve got to say that as much as I was a fan of Dave Burd/Lil Dicky before watching this interview, my admiration for that man has grown exponentially after seeing him dodge religion bias like Patches O’Houlihan dodges a ball. I’m not sure how many Jewish jokes Charlemagne was allotted for this interview, but I’m pretty sure he surpassed whatever the limit was. I’m not an avid listener of The Breakfast Club, nor do I have any experience conducting interviews, but I’m pretty sure that centering every question around making fun of him for being Jewish (and a white rapper) isn’t good radio. It’s not lost on me that Lil Dicky’s whole shtick is the fact that he is a nerdy Jewish rapper, but that’s exactly what it is – a shtick. As he highlighted in the show, there’s a reason he introduces himself as Dave and not Lil Dicky…it’s satirical. But apparently Charlemagne’s remarks didn’t create any beef between the two since he was on the season finale. However, based on the video’s comments, I’m definitely not alone in thinking that Charlemagne’s jokes were in bad taste.

However, what The Breakfast Club interview showed me more than anything is that Lil Dicky is 100% authentic. The only difference is that unlike the Lil Dicky in Dave, he wasn’t willing to freestyle in real life, which might’ve hurt his street cred a little, but I’m sure a guy who openly talks about his small penis could care less about street cred. If anything, he gets more street cred for being so willing to talk about his shrimp dick. Aside from that, his personality matches exactly with who he’s portraying in Dave, and he’s in no way shying away from who he really is which in turn adds to the charm of the show. I’ll be counting the days until season two premieres.

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‘Better Call Saul’ Season 5 Episode 9 – Kim Wears the Pants in This Marriage

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We always knew that Kim wasn’t afraid to speak her mind and never shied away from confrontation, but until last night that was only to guys with receding hairlines in suits. But in the penultimate episode of season 5, which aired last night, Kim revealed that she has the biggest set of balls west of the Mississippi.

The whole time Saul and Mike were walking the the desert last week (episode 8) I totally forgot that Lalo wasn’t supposed to know what happened. If he knew that Mike had saved Jimmy, he’d know that someone in the Salamanca crew was giving intel to Gustavo Fring (Nacho Varga). So, when it came to Saul’s story, it had to be airtight. He told everyone that his car broke down six or seven miles from the pickup location and he had to walk back to the main road through the desert, which required him to spend a night sleeping out there as well. However, Lalo takes the same road that Saul did to pick up the money (coincidence??) to meet his cousins so that he can leave the country, and he discovers Saul’s car in a ravine littered with bullet holes. Instead of continuing with his travel’s abroad, Lalo tells Nacho to drive him back to Albuquerque.

*Knock knock knock*

For two people that have literally zero friends or social life, a knock on the door of their condo only means one thing: trouble.

*Saul opening the door to see Lalo Salamanca*: (in his head) “FUUUUCK”

Saul offers his guest something to drink, as any good host would, but Lalo isn’t there to socialize…he wants to know why the hell Saul’s Suzuki Esteem was in a ditch looking like it had just stormed the beaches of Normandy. According to Saul, it had just broken down, so why would it be all shot up and hidden? After Lalo makes Saul tell him the story of his trek through the desert with $7 million in cash three times, Kim has had enough.

Don’t forget that earlier that day, Kim discovered Saul’s “World’s Best Lawyer” cup, which had several bullet holes in it. She knew that Saul was lying about what really happened out there, but she’ll be damned to let some narco discover the truth!

Don’t forget that Mike has a sniper aimed at Lalo from a roof across the street this entire time in case he tries to kill Saul and/or Kim. 

In what was one of the most badass scenes of the series to far, Kim basically tells Lalo to fuck off if he doesn’t believe Saul’s story, because he is telling the truth! The part that really sold the story was when she said that in New Mexico you can’t even leave a can out without someone shooting at it, so how can you expect people to leave a car alone?? And that my friends, is a QUEEN. Had Saul or Kim wavered from his story for even one moment, Lalo would’ve known that they were full of shit. But, they stuck to their guns (no pun intended) and Lalo totally bought it. He then left their condo with absolutely no rebuttal and headed back to Nacho, who had been waiting in his car outside the whole time.

After quitting her job earlier in the episode, I was on the fence about Kim. I thought she was starting to lose it a little bit. However, after almost single-handedly sending one of the most dangerous men in the cartel packing, I will back her decisions till the end. Since she wasn’t in Breaking Bad, it’ll be really interesting to see what Kim Wexler’s future holds, because as of now, she and Saul seem unstoppable.

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‘Westworld’ Season 3 Episode 5 – Serac Is Definitely a Bad Guy

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I don’t think I’m smart enough/invested enough time into Westworld theories to be an authority figure here, but as a normal person watching this show, I think it’s safe to say this show is off the rails. Even though Dolores significantly altered the Westworld universe in “Genre”, the fifth episode of season 3, I won’t excuse it for being by far the most boring episode of the season so far. She finally released humanity of the routines Rehoboam had planned for them, thus allowing them to control their own fates for the first time in their lives. As was expected, people started to lose their shit when they found out their lives had been controlled by a system all along.

We also learned a little more about Serac’s origin, aside from the fact that Paris was nuked during his childhood. I’m not going to lie to you, I didn’t understand a single thing about the building of Rehoboam except for the fact that Serac and his brother built it to save humanity from itself. Enter Dempsey: owner of Incite, which has access to a ton of the world’s data. Dempsey backs the brothers and they build a supercomputer that can effectively predict the world’s events and plan the future. However, the most distracting part of the Serac/Dempsey storyline was the sudden jump in time where Serac aged 30 years and Dempsey aged five.

Via HBO

Another significant part of the episode was that Caleb knows Dolores is a host. She took those bullets like a champ, which obviously means that she is not human. But, that didn’t alter Caleb’s loyalty to her at all. If anything, it strengthened his loyalty because she effectively saved his life even though he was tripping on genre (a psychedelic drug) much of the episode.

This episode also continued the tradition of Westworld episodes incorporating orchestral renditions of pop songs. This week’s rendition was of David Bowie’s “Space Oddity”, an all-time favorite song of mine; although “Wicked Games” takes the cake for my favorite rendition this season.

We also didn’t get any Maeve action this episode which tells me that we can expect to learn a lot more about her next week. My guess is that the robotic tag team duo of Bernard and Stubbs somehow link up with Maeve and take down Dolores. I think it’s too obvious that Maeve would team up with Dolores because she has as much reason as anyone to hate humanity. However, once she sees how reckless Dolores has been, she’ll team up with Bernard and Stubbs – especially after how Liam Jr. was just killed.

Through the first four episodes, this was my favorite season of Westworld so far, but episode five was a huge step back in terms of confusing storylines. The confusion aspect, in addition to my lack of empathy with the hosts in the first two seasons were my biggest concerns with the show before this season. All I know is that I need more Beast Mode in his #mood shirt.

Via HBO
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‘Modern Family’ Finale Marks the End of an Era

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The series finale of Modern Family aired tonight, capping off 11 seasons of one of the most successful sitcoms in history. Much like the Lakers were the team of the 1980’s, Modern Family was the show of the 2010’s, especially because it spanned the entire length of the decade. In my personal opinion, I think it’s the last of its kind. Networks are struggling to compete with platforms like Netflix, Hulu, and Prime Video which allow for so much more artistic freedom. Seriously, when was the last time anyone really cared about a show on CBS, NBC, ABC, or FOX? I’m not saying people don’t watch the shows on those networks, but premium cable and streaming services are dominating the industry and awards shows.

Therefore, the finale of Modern Family marks the end of an era that we very likely will never see again. My family and I have watched this show religiously since the pilot episode, and we’ve celebrated the countless Emmy’s and Golden Globes that it received over the years like the Dodgers had just won the World Series. It’s stretch of FIVE consecutive Emmy wins for “Best Comedy Series” is only matched by Frasier, and is a feat I’m sure will never be reached again. Only the 1949-1953 Yankees have matched that type of success, and that was back when pitchers topped out at 85 and players still needed offseason jobs to survive. I’ll even go on record to say that those early seasons of Modern Family are undoubtedly the best of any sitcom in the last 25 years, and possibly of all time (you’ll need a boomer to tell you if it was better than Golden Girls or whatever shows they watched before the Clinton presidency). Yes, that means I hold it in higher regard than The Office and Friends, two of the most beloved shows by people of my generation. I’m not saying those weren’t good/great shows, I’m just saying that Modern Family was better. And just like The Office and Friends, I think Modern Family will have a resurgence in a couple years when younger people rediscover it on Hulu and realize just how awesome it was.

However, I’d be lying if I said I thought every season was better than the last, because they weren’t. But do you realize how hard it would be to write 250 equally amazing episodes of a single show? Eventually, the storyline falls a bit flat, the actors don’t exude the same charisma they did in the early seasons, or key characters exit the show. It happened to The Office when Michael left, in Friends when Joey and Rachel started to have feelings for each other, and to Modern Family when they brought back Dylan. I’ve never known what it’s like to write 22 minutes of intriguing TV, but even I knew that was a lame decision. But by then they had accomplished so much that it didn’t spoil anything about the series for me, unlike season 8 of Game of Thrones. I’d say season seven was the last truly great season of the show, even though the later episodes were still more enjoyable than anything else on network TV.

It would be impossible to write about Modern Family without reminiscing about some of its best episodes. I’ve narrowed it down to my top three episodes from the series: “My Funky Valentine”, “Family Portrait”, and “Caught in the Act”. “My Funky Valentine” introduced us to Phil and Claire’s sexy alter ego’s: Clive Bixby and Juliana, who they play when they want to spice things up in their relationship. “Family Portrait” set up an awkward situation for Phil when Gloria kisses him on the “Kiss Cam” at a Lakers game. He’s worried that Jay and Claire are going to find out and be pissed, which makes Phil act even weirder than he usually is. Plus the episode gave us on of the series’ most iconic family photos.

However, my all-time favorite episode is “Caught in the Act” which is where the Dunphy kids walk in on their parents having sex. Eventually Jay and Gloria are brought into the mix, because what father wouldn’t want to hear about his daughter having sex?! I also want to give a shoutout to “Manny Get Your Gun” which features one of my favorite Mitch and Cam scenes ever.

I’ve watched a lot of shows from start to finish in my life, but this one cuts deep. It was one of the first shows (aside from Disney or Nickelodeon) that I watched on a weekly basis. Now that I’ve started reminiscing about old episodes and watched some of my favorite scenes, it makes me realize how much of my life this show was on the air and how influential it’s been on not only me, but my family as well. Shows like this always feel like they’ll be around forever, but the sad reality is that all good things must come to an end. Wednesday’s at 9 PM won’t feel the same without you. Now if you don’t mind, excuse me while I binge all 250 episodes of Modern Family through the rest of this quarantine.

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“Just Before Your Time” TV Shows Millenials & Gen Z Should Binge During Quarantine

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It’s an odd time to be a sportswriter given every American sports league has been postponed or cancelled. Lucky for you, I am also obsessed with TV and movies. Now that we don’t have any sports to watch, there has never been a better time in the history of the world to binge watch TV shows. But what should you watch? So often we forget about how good shows from the past were, given we’re usually just trying to keep up with what’s current. In doing that however, we miss out on so much. Based on conversations with other people my age (early 20’s), I’ve come to realize that most either haven’t heard of these shows at all or just haven’t watched them. It’s true, these were our parents’ shows, but they are just as enjoyable today as they were when they originally aired. They all stand the test of time and are definitely worth a binge. Here are the top 5 shows young(er) people might’ve missed but definitely need to watch during the age of social distancing and quarantines.

5.Mad Men (2007-2015)

The most recently-aired show of the group, Mad Men will introduce you to the world of advertising in the turbulent 1960’s. Arguably the wildest decade of the twentieth century, ranging from the Civil Rights movements, counterculture, the assassination of JFK, the space race, etc. you get it all. This show introduced Jon Hamm to the world as Don Draper: advertising creative executive. Draper is the epitome of what every 15-year-old boy strives to be when they grow up – wealthy, handsome, and suave (in business and with the ladies). Every girl likes Don and every guy wants to be him. He’s also hiding a huge secret that is essential to understanding why he is the way he is. If I made this show seem like it’s only for testosterone-filled men I apologize…the show also dives deep into the women’s empowerment movement with characters like Peggy Olson (Elisabeth Moss) and Joan Holloway (Christina Hendricks). Women were still thought of as second-class citizens behind men in the 60’s, and these ladies prove to be strong-willed role models that young and old women of today can look up to. If I’m still not enticing you to watch this show, then I’ll let the Emmy awards speak for themselves.

4.Entourage (2004-2011)

The lone comedy on the list, Entourage follows Hollywood rising star Vinny Chase (Adrian Grenier) and his boys: E (Kevin Connolly), Drama (Kevin Dillon), Turtle (Jerry Ferrara), plus his agent Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven). Most of us will never be famous actors, and will never experience the sex, drugs, and rock and roll that go along with it. Be so that it may, Entourage is the closest we will ever get to that lifestyle, and shows why fame can also be exhausting despite the money and girls. As entertaining as Vinny and his boys are, the show isn’t what it is without Ari Gold. Early on in the show, Ari’s character isn’t much more than a pervy-douche Hollywood agent, but the smartest thing the writers ever did was make him a likeable character. His one-liners usually aimed at his gay Asian assistant Lloyd would be too taboo for TV nowadays but are hilarious nonetheless and remind you just how much society has changed in the last 15 years. Unlike Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad, where viewers are required to follow the story attentively, Entourage is not that type of show; It’s easily digestible show with episodes ranging from 20-30 minutes. Sit back, relax, and enjoy.

P.S. The movie is much better than the reviews say. 

3.The Wire (2002-2008)

Stated by me to be the most underrated show of all time since it never won a single Emmy, The Wire is one of the most entertaining shows I’ve ever seen. Set in Baltimore “B-more”, Maryland, the show revolves around the Baltimore Police Department and their relationship with the crime scene largely centered on drugs. One of the most interesting things about the show is that you aren’t necessarily seeing things through the eyes of one person. You could consider the main character to be Detective Jimmy McNulty (Dominic West), but you see things through the lens of various cops and criminals throughout the show which gives you a more well-rounded view of the characters. Idris Elba and Michael B. Jordan also played key roles in the show, with Elba acting as the mastermind of the “Barksdale crew”. A fan favorite is Omar Little (Michael K. Williams), who is the sawed off shotgun-wielding gangster who robs drug dealers. There are so many aspects of this show show you just how complicated the police department and crews run in the city. After watching this show you’ll feel like you know “Bawlmer” like the back of your hand.

2.The Sopranos (1999-2007)

As one of the most famous TV shows of all time, I’m surprised more people my age haven’t watched The Sopranos. It’s commonly referred to as the show that changed TV and it solidified HBO as a premium cable network. Plus, everybody loves the mafia. Some of the best movies ever made dealt with the mob, and The Sopranos is basically a prolonged, modern day (in 1999) Goodfellas. You get to see the world through the eyes of New Jersey mob boss Tony Soprano (James Gandolfini), who tries to balance life between the mob and his family. Trying to hide the fact that he’s in the mob isn’t easy for him in an age where his kids have access to TV and the internet, and it’s a constant struggle for him to keep that side of his life hidden. While constantly in the high-intensity, masculine environment of the mob, Tony’s confides in his wife Carmela (Edie Falco) and therapist Dr. Jennifer Melfi (Lorraine Bracco) proving that he’s not the average mobster. It’s popularity has never dwindled for those that watched the infamous series, as they are making a prequel movie about the early life of the show’s protagonist Tony Soprano, who is portrayed by his real life son, Michael. Better watch the show now before the movie comes out!

1.Band of Brothers (2001)

I’m not sure how long this coronavirus pandemic is going to last, so if there’s one show you NEED to watch over the course of the next few weeks/months it’s Band of Brothers. It’s a ten episode miniseries that chronicles the story of Easy Company of the U.S. Army 101st Airborne Division, and their mission in World War II Europe, from Operation Overlord, through V-J Day. What makes this show so unbelievably good is that they used accounts from the actual men who served in Easy Company, making it arguably the most historically accurate depiction of WWII in television and movie history. The great thing about miniseries’ is that they get straight to the point. Over the course of ten hours you learn everything about what these men went through to (spoiler alert) defeat the Nazi’s. Executive produced by Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg and a cast featuring Damian Lewis, Ron Livingston, Donnie Wahlberg, and David Schwimmer, every person needs to watch this show. Even if you’re not a war show/movie person, the shot of patriotism it’ll give you is more than enough reason to watch. ‘MERICA.

If you’re keeping track, that’s 4/5 HBO shows on the list. I don’t have a bias toward premium cable television, it just so happens that they’ve made some of the best TV shows of all time. And if you think I left a show off my list, there’s a reason why Breaking Bad didn’t make the cut: most people I know have seen it. While it was on at the same time as Mad Men, it was absolutely the more popular of the two, even among the younger demographic. However, it you haven’t seen Breaking Bad, it is a must-watch as well. I clearly have watch a lot of TV in my day, and I’m proud to say I feel like I’ve chosen the right shows. I love bad reality TV as much as the next person, but instead of filling your head with that nonsense while quarantined, try out one or more of these shows listed above and experience what well-written TV is like. If you could care less about my recommendations, at least watch them to understand more Family Guy references.

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