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Jason Garrett is on Borrowed Time

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If Jerry Jones has any self respect, Jason Garrett should have just coached his last game for the Dallas Cowboys. After Jones finishes his now tainted Thanksgiving meal, thanks to a demoralizing home loss to the Bills; he should give his pal Jason a call.

Although Dallas is now 6-6, (Not the worst record I’ve seen) Garrett has yet to coach this very talented football team to any meaningful wins. They should be cruising in one of the weakest divisions in football, however, week after week they have been an embarrassment on national television.

America’s team needs new blood, a team with this good of a roster should be at the top of the league. But with Garrett at the helm, his ship is sinking and fast.

Garrett has been able to fly under the radar for sometime now, but now in the face of adversity, his true colors have become apparent.

In this new, statistical overhaul of the sports world, Garrett lacks the ability to adapt. He publicly admitted that he does not use statistical analysis in-game to make decisions, and clearly it shows. The Ravens on the other hand, make it a point to utilize statistical analysis in-game to alter both game-plan and decision making. Lamar Jackson, while absolutely electric, isn’t the only reason this team has punted twice in the last 3 games.

Jerry if you’re reading, it’s not too late! Garrett needs to go, this is new school football, and you need a numbers guy. Otherwise, this team will continue to underperform, and lose their grasp on the NFC East.

As much as I’m all for old school smash mouth football, in order to succeed in this league, you need to take advantage of these nuanced numbers guys, regardless whether or not they have ever coached or played. They might not be able to throw a spiral, or even catch a football, but damn these nerds know their shit.

Pecks

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The Rams Season Is Dead. Culprit: The Baltimore Ravens

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It pains me to say it, but the Rams are done. Season over. Smell ya later. I’m writing this with two minutes left in their Monday night game against the Ravens, and honestly they should just knee it and run out the clock. At least that way no one will get hurt more than their self-esteem’s already are.

Aaaand Jimmy Smith just picked Goff, god dammit.

I wrote last week about how their possible path to the playoffs, but after watching this game I have zero hope for any playoff appearance. They just got absolutely embarrassed by Lamar Jackson on defense. I’m pretty sure they scored on every offensive possession. Yeah Jackson is good but the Rams defense has to put up some kind of fight there.

And as if the game wasn’t tough enough to watch, we had to listen to Booger McFarland and Joe Tessitore absolutely suck off Lamar Jackson the entire game like he’s the second coming of Christ.

Chill out guys…yeah he’s really good at football and is definitely going to win MVP, but holy shit let the guy play a few more years before you dub him the chosen one. But then again, Booger has famously been one of the worst commentators in sports:

This is the only one I kinda liked:

When they weren’t jerking off Jackson, they were shitting on Jared Goff and the Rams (rightfully so). But that’s not necessarily what was so annoying. They really started to question what the Rams were going to do about the quarterback position after the Rams literally just signed Goff to a four-year, $134 million extension this past offseason. This is a guy who just took the Rams to the Super Bowl last year and is still only 24. And they think he’s done? LOL. I think it’s just a Super Bowl hangover year for the team and Goff feels the pressure to live up to his contract. He’ll be back to his normal self next year, I know it.

It’s pretty sad to say their season is done with 5 games left, but I don’t see them catching the Seahawks or Vikings/Packers the way those teams are playing. Rams offense is sputtering and their defense looked like absolute garbage. It might be time to get rid of that geriatric Wade Phillips and reinvent the defense, because they haven’t looked great all year. I think this game was a real wake-up call to the Rams organization, and with that stadium they’re moving into next year, they better put a winning team on the field.

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